Close

What makes you feel close to your spouse?

When do you feel close to your spouse?

Feeling close is an interesting concept and experience. It occurred to me last week while sitting beside Libby in church. It is still a novel experience for me to be beside her during the sermon instead of up front of her and everyone else giving the sermon. I notice her, almost like seeing her for the first time. She’s cute. She’s thoughtfully engaged, nodding her head, giving little “Hmmm,” responses of affirmation.

And I feel close to her.

And I appreciate her.

“So, Libby, what makes you feel close to me?”

“Whenever I feel taken care of,”

(That surprises me for several reasons. First, she does most of the taking-care-of for me and everyone else. Secondly, she never seems like she needs taken care of.)

“Like when we plan something together,” she says.

“And, whenever you speak to me in a cheerful voice. When you answer me cheerfully.”

(I don’t have the courage to ask her how often that is. And I am sure that she can detect when it is fake cheerfulness to get her off my trail.)

We both said that closeness is something worth thinking about, something to appreciate and be mindful of. Other things will occur to us just because we asked the question.

What makes you feel close to your spouse?