Practicing Fondness

Endearing: inspiring feelings of affection or admiration.

Prompt: Name a characteristic you find endearing about your spouse.

Our Experience

This conversation was harder to get started than I thought it would be. We were just staring at each other, a little embarrassed that an obvious response wasn’t jumping out. We are perhaps too familiar with each other after years of marriage to recognize moments that are endearing. Also, most of our conversations are about life-management, family stuff and schedules. As a result, our capacity to be fascinated with each other is diminished. (Hence, the value of PFL Good Conversations.)

“It’s endearing to me to see how much you enjoy the grandkids,” Libby says.

She added that hearing my animated conversations on the phone with our adult children is similar. (See Alive! from last week.) And then it occurred to her that it is endearing anytime she sees me enjoying someone. Why is that endearing to her, I wondered? Is it because I am so invigorated in those moments?

“There are a lot of little things you do that I find endearing,” I start. “Like the way you can instantly reproduce an accent. I bet I’m the only person that gets to hear you do that.”

But certainly, Libby’s most endearing characteristic is her positive attitude and ability to encourage others.

The other day, Libby was beginning to go on a walk, but she stopped to speak to a neighbor who was in his driveway with his two-year-old son. Down the street a woman was walking her dog, a Corgi. As she got closer to Libby and the neighbor she asked, “May my dog come and meet you? He thinks you have a cheerful countenance. He doesn’t like many people but has been straining to come meet you.”

It’s official!

Libby is the most cheerful person on the planet.

What characteristic of your spouse do you find endearing?